undefined

Simple-living advocate Ruth Stout, author of Gardening Without Work and How to Have a Green Thumb Without an Aching Back, believed that life just doesn't have to be so hard! In If You Would Be Happy, she once again helps you find the sense amid all the nonsense that life offers, and find simplicity amid the rough and tumble of life. She says: "It is happiness, not perfection, we're concerned with here, and they're not necessarily even related." "Our activities are successful insofar as they are giving us real satisfaction." "Any experience, trivial or important, is likely to give us more pleasure if we are interested, unhurried, and are looking for the best the situation has to offer. It also helps if we expect something good, for in that case we don't overlook it if it's there in front of us." "We must forever keep in mind that it is our inside feelings we are ing to change; we are really going to become a serene and pleasant person, not merely give the appearance of one." Foreword by Michaela Lonning As a counselor, I've read plenty of self-help, recovery, and psychology books over the years, and I'm familiar with therapies and techniques that instruct people in how to be happier. If You Would Be Happy is different from any of the happiness manuals I've read though, because it's so refreshingly frank and conversational. Ruth Stout is the eccentric relative that I wish I'd had, one with that refreshing mix of caring and candor. Rather than challenging errors in my thinking or analyzing my issues, she might serve tea, and point outside to a lovely flower in bloom. She would have modeled for me that there's happiness to be found, right here, right now. No fuss, no formula. Ruth's ideas are far from new. They are continually being rediscovered and repackaged, often in forms far more elaborate than Ruth's deceptively simple wisdom. For example, DBT (dialectical behavior therapy) teaches mindfulness, as well as giving step by step guidance in important skills, like to keep the little things from building up into catastrophes. And it shows, step by step, how to make interactions smoother, how to relate to difficulties without inadvertently making them worse, and how to keep small things from building up into catastrophes. These are good skills. They are outlined in DBT handbooks and worksheets, hundreds of DBT groups meet every week to discuss these skills, and many people are helped. The best DBT therapy relies on the humor that the counselor brings to the process. If you're looking for the kind of candor and wit that DBT therapists are encouraged to offer, this book is a great source. If You Would Be Happy is meant to help anybody with a desire to have a bit more or a lot more contentment. Ruth offers plenty of case examples, funny and touching ones about that neighbor down the road, or that eccentric acquaintance that stayed with her years ago. This book reminds us that we are in this happiness quest together. We could all use a little coaching now and then to take our troubles a bit less seriously and to tend to our own happiness, and the contentment of those around us. These ideas apply to grown-ups and children alike. They're fun, they work. And they just make sense! Michaela Lonning, Corvallis, Oregon Contents 1. Some Common Sense Will Come in Handy 2. Humble Joys Are Better Than None 3. Making Our Minds Toe the Mark 4. Growing Up Emotionally 5. What Do You Want? Quoth God. Pay the Price and Take It.' 6. Don t Depend on Things That Can Desert You 7. Making ains Out of Molehills 8. Petty Values Belong on the T Pile 9. Light Shimmering Through the Darkness 10. And Now You Have Earned the Right to Dream